The proverbial Marathon
The NYC Marathon was today. Me and our cab driver might have been the only 2 people in New York City who didn’t know that.😂
He dropped us off 2 blocks away from RMH because of road closures and either he played the part well or he had no clue it was the famous NYC marathon which literally ran directly next to RMH up 1st Avenue! So, here is Charlotte and I with 2 suitcases, a medium duffel bag of books and crafts and toys, 2 back packs of gear, and our winter coats walking towards RMH through the crowd. When we see it’s a race with blockades, I asked a stranger “Is this a marathon? As in the New York City Marathon?!?” Deep breaths...we were dumped by our cab on the opposite side of the barricades with no foreseeable way across. We walked back up and found a little restaurant to regroup. Some chips and guacamole and a couple carnitas later, I formed a plan. I hailed another taxi to take us to where we could cross and planned to then walk across to other side to hail a cab back the other way to try to entee into back way to RMH. Taxi politely declined us though and said Marathon will go until 5pm. It was 2pm😳! So back to the barricade we trek’d and several slightly intoxicated 20 something year olds helped us get to the front and wave down a police officer across the street. The officer came over with her partner and offered to help us cross! I had 2 refrigerated medications with the ice pack thawing we needed to get to our fridge, not to mention we couldn’t stand out there for hours with all of our gear. We were so grateful! So, if you happened to see a little girl in a pink hat being carried across the NYC marathon race barricade on TV with a crazy looking mom carrying an obscene amount of baggage running behind them, zig zagging around the runners, then...that would have been us🤣. We laughed and laughed once we safely crossed. So many nice strangers in NYC!
Always the adventure! But really cabby? If I ever see you again....😡
So, we continue to try to make lemonade whenever we can. Charlotte seemed ok with leaving for this trip until we started to land and then out of the blue she asked if this was just a check up. I had told her we were coming for more medicine to help her cancer never grow back, but I guess it didn’t sink in. When I explained we were here again for the same medicine as last time her eyes got big and tears began to form. She started to cry and told me she is afraid of this medicine. I think she understand this is the treatment that makes her hurt. And sometimes, in moments like these, it’s hard to know what is best to do. Should I just hold her and let her cry, trying to be a quiet source of comfort and understanding. Should I try to tell her how it’ll all be ok and that she is so brave, doing all that we could ever ask, doing all that is necessary to help herself beat this cancer? Do I down play my own emotions so that I appear more calm and matter of fact and strong for her?
The answer is, we do all of these things I suppose. Today, I down played my own emotions. I usually do. I let her cry and told her it’s ok if she’s afraid or sad. I held her and let her know it WILL be ok and that she’s doing so well, with my let’s take it day by day and step by step approach. The truth is, this IS hard. Hard on her and on her siblings and on her dad and I. It feels like a marathon, but one we could have never trained for. But the truth is also, we CAN do this hard thing. We feel strength from above and from those who love us. We have the never ending support of our amazing family and friends and neighbors and village. We have a great medical team. We have an organization in Children’s Cancer Partners of the Carolinas. We have God and each other.
So tomorrow morning Charlotte will endure day 1 of round 2 hu3F8. It will be a hard day. But we know she can do the hard things. We don’t always know why she has to, but we know she can. And so can Brian and the kids. And somehow, I can too. I have to.
Please join us in praying this round goes as expected. That this immunotherapy be as effective as possible, and perhaps as gentle as it can be for our sweet girl. Please pray for my own strength and confidence. And also for Brian and the kids back home as they are missing us while carrying on in work and school. I will never forget Taylor’s face when she learned I would be here over my birthday. She was heart broken but I reminded her it was ok to celebrate again a few days late when I get back home. And my sweet Parker really takes the separation to heart. Now a days, I’m not so sure if it’s me or Charlotte he yearns for more because although he is such a mommas boy, he has become so incredibly close with Charlotte. The two of them play so much together and are as thick as thieves most days.
Thanks to all of you offering to bring a meal, or have sent a gift (sooo many thank yous to get out!), or said a prayer, or sent a joke, or offered to help with Taylor or Parker (especially Nana Schuey and Poppy again). We have THE BEST village behind us. You help us do the hard things. We feel you cheering our girl on. God bless you all. Charlotte’s got this. She will keep going, keep moving, to finish this marathon❤️🌈
He dropped us off 2 blocks away from RMH because of road closures and either he played the part well or he had no clue it was the famous NYC marathon which literally ran directly next to RMH up 1st Avenue! So, here is Charlotte and I with 2 suitcases, a medium duffel bag of books and crafts and toys, 2 back packs of gear, and our winter coats walking towards RMH through the crowd. When we see it’s a race with blockades, I asked a stranger “Is this a marathon? As in the New York City Marathon?!?” Deep breaths...we were dumped by our cab on the opposite side of the barricades with no foreseeable way across. We walked back up and found a little restaurant to regroup. Some chips and guacamole and a couple carnitas later, I formed a plan. I hailed another taxi to take us to where we could cross and planned to then walk across to other side to hail a cab back the other way to try to entee into back way to RMH. Taxi politely declined us though and said Marathon will go until 5pm. It was 2pm😳! So back to the barricade we trek’d and several slightly intoxicated 20 something year olds helped us get to the front and wave down a police officer across the street. The officer came over with her partner and offered to help us cross! I had 2 refrigerated medications with the ice pack thawing we needed to get to our fridge, not to mention we couldn’t stand out there for hours with all of our gear. We were so grateful! So, if you happened to see a little girl in a pink hat being carried across the NYC marathon race barricade on TV with a crazy looking mom carrying an obscene amount of baggage running behind them, zig zagging around the runners, then...that would have been us🤣. We laughed and laughed once we safely crossed. So many nice strangers in NYC!
Always the adventure! But really cabby? If I ever see you again....😡
So, we continue to try to make lemonade whenever we can. Charlotte seemed ok with leaving for this trip until we started to land and then out of the blue she asked if this was just a check up. I had told her we were coming for more medicine to help her cancer never grow back, but I guess it didn’t sink in. When I explained we were here again for the same medicine as last time her eyes got big and tears began to form. She started to cry and told me she is afraid of this medicine. I think she understand this is the treatment that makes her hurt. And sometimes, in moments like these, it’s hard to know what is best to do. Should I just hold her and let her cry, trying to be a quiet source of comfort and understanding. Should I try to tell her how it’ll all be ok and that she is so brave, doing all that we could ever ask, doing all that is necessary to help herself beat this cancer? Do I down play my own emotions so that I appear more calm and matter of fact and strong for her?
The answer is, we do all of these things I suppose. Today, I down played my own emotions. I usually do. I let her cry and told her it’s ok if she’s afraid or sad. I held her and let her know it WILL be ok and that she’s doing so well, with my let’s take it day by day and step by step approach. The truth is, this IS hard. Hard on her and on her siblings and on her dad and I. It feels like a marathon, but one we could have never trained for. But the truth is also, we CAN do this hard thing. We feel strength from above and from those who love us. We have the never ending support of our amazing family and friends and neighbors and village. We have a great medical team. We have an organization in Children’s Cancer Partners of the Carolinas. We have God and each other.
So tomorrow morning Charlotte will endure day 1 of round 2 hu3F8. It will be a hard day. But we know she can do the hard things. We don’t always know why she has to, but we know she can. And so can Brian and the kids. And somehow, I can too. I have to.
Please join us in praying this round goes as expected. That this immunotherapy be as effective as possible, and perhaps as gentle as it can be for our sweet girl. Please pray for my own strength and confidence. And also for Brian and the kids back home as they are missing us while carrying on in work and school. I will never forget Taylor’s face when she learned I would be here over my birthday. She was heart broken but I reminded her it was ok to celebrate again a few days late when I get back home. And my sweet Parker really takes the separation to heart. Now a days, I’m not so sure if it’s me or Charlotte he yearns for more because although he is such a mommas boy, he has become so incredibly close with Charlotte. The two of them play so much together and are as thick as thieves most days.
Thanks to all of you offering to bring a meal, or have sent a gift (sooo many thank yous to get out!), or said a prayer, or sent a joke, or offered to help with Taylor or Parker (especially Nana Schuey and Poppy again). We have THE BEST village behind us. You help us do the hard things. We feel you cheering our girl on. God bless you all. Charlotte’s got this. She will keep going, keep moving, to finish this marathon❤️🌈
Praying this round goes as expected and for this immunotherapy to be as effective as possible, and as gentle as it can be for your beautiful Charlotte. Praying for your own strength and confidence. And also for Brian and the kids! XOXO
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